Career as a klutz

After an extremely busy and eventful weekend, I have surprised myself at just how weird and clueless I can be at times.
Aside from the usual shenanigans, (like managing to scratch my latin teacher while I was dancing with someone else,) I had a few out of the ordinary experiences. We tried sand dune training for one of our fitness sessions this week, and while being extremely hard and actually quite fun, I'm not sure whether I looked more like a beached whale or a crab that was missing a majority of its legs. I then had to go from this to my first ever physio appointment (but before I made it inside I walked up and down the street four or five times looking for the right place, and eventually had to a guy in a pizza place where to go. He was very nice.) Once inside, I received an extremely awkward butt massage and left half a beach on the massage table.
When I finally got home, Mr Emphysema was sitting out on his front lawn, and smiled and waved to me. I was so surprised that I dropped the pen I was carrying, and when I bent to pick it up, my sports bag slipped down my back, so that when I stood up, it caught under my butt, and I hobbled around hunchbacked for a good ten seconds before freeing myself and hurriedly waving back to my newly friendly neighbour while avoiding eye contact and running for cover.
I had my first shift at my new café job, and I'm really proud that I didn't drop or spill anything, but I did manage to endanger a child. While delivering the last part of an order to a young couple and their toddler, I accidentally kicked the leg of the high chair, causing it to rock precariously. I stood there paralysed, having no clue what to do, and just watching the looks of horror on the parents faces. Luckily, the kid seemed to really enjoy it, and laughed his little chocolate smeared head off, which seemed to break the tension. He got his own back on me though, because as they left, he tipped his plate of chips all over the floor and left me to deal with them.
 Towards the end of the shift when it had quietened down, the barista offered to make me a hot chocolate. It was the best hot chocolate I had ever had, and although I tried to be delicate and make sure none of it got on my face, when I got to the car, I found that I had worked the last half an hour with cocoa stuck all around the edges of my mouth. Smooth.
I then moved on to a State of Origin promo at ANZ stadium. where I was required to wear a blue bob wig that was far less than flattering. One little girl thought I was Katy Perry, started squealing and hugged my legs, one man tried to yank the wig from my head when I said I didn't have any spares that he could have, and one seedy middle aged guy told me that he didn't want the flyers I was handing out, he just wanted my number, as he was recently divorced.
I then decided that this was plenty of activity for a Friday and Saturday, and rounded out my social activities for the weekend my watching two of my teachers in concert with their dance crew. It was absolutely hilarious, and the dancing was phenomenal. You should check them out on Youtube, just search 'Phly Crew.' After this event, all my friends went out, and I returned home to spend my night with a bottle of diet coke, my assessments and some cookbooks, earning me an A+ in antisocial efforts.
           Xx, Little Duck